Run Away.

I can't tell you when it originated but for as long as I can remember now, I have had this burning desire that shoots straight to the depths of my heart to -run away.-

For the holidays this year, it was quite unexpected to feel such relief being in a familiar environment. I have been craving change, adventure and ...something magical for so long that I really didn't think I would feel so at peace the moment I was in Washington. It was nice. It was nice to be siting in the back seat of a car, looking out to a clear, calm and chilled day, trying to catch each branch, each building as they passed by too quickly...not having any other care in the world..not feeling anything else except feeling 'okay.'

I realized: We too often try to escape it- but sometimes, the familiar is what we need.

This lasted only for a short while. Which was fine. It was a good reminder. But now that I am back in Hermosa....I have that feeling again. More than ever, I do. I believe a part of it is because I literally want to run away from things that are going on in my life. I know thats not necessarily the best or most mature way to think. And oh what a tough life I have- I live at the beach..right? The other part, I believe is because there's something out there that I, in particular need to experience, need to discover, need to see, to feel.......Its not just your ordinary desire to "travel and see the world," or the feeling of being "sick of this damn place and I just want to get out" type of feeling. Its more than that. It almost feels like a prerequisite for my life, before I can move onto anything else. It feels like a necessity for my existence. It feels inescapable. It feels like God planted it there in my heart and wove it simultaneously with my soul. It feels like it was in me since the moment He thought of me.

What is out there? What am I searching for? I am fulfilled in many ways..through many ways- but this is one piece I have yet to find, to figure out. Not until I actually pick up, and leave.

And run away.